Isolation on a spiritual path

Most of us start to feel lonely and misunderstood when we first awake spiritually. Since spiritual awareness is still not mainstream (although we’re getting there) people feel isolated when they cannot share their newly found discoveries and exciting experiences with others – may it be due to a lack of understanding or a fear of being ridiculed or criticised.

The fundamental reason for our isolation is that lightworkers are still relatively scarce. Because there are not many of us who consciously do the energy work, we need to be evenly spread on the surface of the planet. This divinely orchestrated distribution serves two purposes – it helps activate the Earth’s grid and to spread the light of consciousness to others – hence serving the collective.

With all that being said, there is also an individual reason behind that. My belief is that we are overestimating social interactions because of contemporary culture and societal programming. It starts in early childhood when we are brought to playgroups as babies, and continues through life – we want to be popular at school, we want to have many friends both in real life and on social media, and we don’t want to be single. Whenever we want to go out, watch a movie, or travel – we search for company. Whenever we feel sad or excited – we grab a phone. Whenever we feel bored – we look for others.

I am not trying to discredit human interactions – they can be beautiful, nurturing and deep. What I am trying to discredit are shallow human interactions stemming from the inability of being alone, the need of external validation or even fear. And at the same time I am trying to restore the sacredness of solitude. Many ancient and indigenous cultures respect wise hermits, and recognize a need for solitude and silent contemplation. Their society members neither constantly chat nor participate in a lifelong popularity contest.

In a modern western culture the only time we embrace these values is during meditation or retreats, which fortunately become more and more mainstream.

All our lives we are trained for social interactions to the extent that we sacrifice quality for quantity as the interaction becomes a goal itself. Even as adults we still admire and/or aspire to be popular – just like highschool kids. We tend to see ourselves and others through our social connections and interactions. We often believe that in order to be happy people need to be in a romantic relationship aka with their other half, and surrounded by family and friends. Our social media in which likes, friends and followers are a measure of one’s success reflect these beliefs. 

As a society we do not respect or appreciate people who prefer to be on their own and keep to themselves. We often call them loners and excentrics, or even weirdos and losers. And obviously we fear to be labeled as such.

Because of this social programming we tend to constantly seek social interactions and external validation. Whenever something happens in our lives, we grab the phone or post on social media – telling others about our experience, asking if it happens to them as well and wanting to know what they think about it. Moreover, a desperate need of being in relationships – be it with our own family, friends or a romantic partner – sometimes leads to forming and/or staying in the relationships which not only do not nurture us but which are codependent or simply toxic.

All that being said, even if we do not realize we need solitude, the chances are that our Higher Self will provide us with an opportunity and a spiritual initiation to learn important spiritual lessons which can only be learned in solitude. Although we often hate these lessons at first if we trust the process, we may actually grow not only to understand but also to appreciate them.

One of the most important qualities of solitude is silence. Some things can only be heard in silence. When we are alone, far from the continuous social chatter, we may feel uncomfortable at first. But if we do not try to fill this silence with other voices like movies, radio etc, and we let this silence sink in, we start to clearly hear and feel our thoughts and emotions better. It is like living in a meditative state outside of a formal meditation practice. If we just embrace them, and witness them without judgement or following, we start to hear other things in the spaces between our thoughts. We start to hear our own heartbeat, the whisper of our Higher Self and our spiritual guides. And before we know we are living 24/7 in a meditative state outside of a formal meditation practice. 

When we stop to immediately share every single spiritual experience with others, we make space for contemplation, deeper understanding and finally embodiment of our new discoveries. And we learn to rely on our own spiritual guidance in the process.

Trusting yourself and your divine nature is another very important lesson. Embracing your own sovereignty and discovering your power are other lessons which cannot be overestimated.

In practical terms we learn to process everything on our own without external influence. We learn to hear and trust our intuition and our guidance. We learn to depend on ourselves and not on others for advice, consolation or soothing. The more we do it, the more self reliant we become. And we deepen our relationship with self, our Higher Self, our spiritual guidance and the Divine in the process.

And then we are ready for the next level of relationships in which we interact with others because we love them, and not because we need them.